There is a certain freedom in letting go...

 

My blog is back. I didn't realize how much writing was actually helping me. I also didn't realize how much each of you were helping me in the process of healing, overcoming, and moving on. Thank you for allowing me to have an outlet for my randomness. Thank you for reading...even if you don't agree or think I'm crazy.  It's all good. It's all just me...being me. 💗

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A few weeks ago, I had the afternoon off work. Surprisingly, the weather was actually nice that day. Nice weather = walking outside.  When I take the time to walk outside, my favorite place to go is Swan Lake State Park in Carroll.  The full trail around the lake is about 4 miles (walk about .2 miles at the end of the trail to make it the full 4.0). It's one of my happy places. It's incredibly peaceful. I love nature and water. I also love the random deer that walk across my path as if I don't exist. For whatever reason, I am able to reflect and disconnect from life's craziness during my lake walks.  This particular day, I started off by praying. God and I had a lot to discuss...so, we did just that! 😉 Now, I've never been that person who says, "well, God told me 'xyz' or 'this or that'."  He just doesn't do that with me. But, today seemed different. From the moment I pulled into the parking lot, throughout my prayer time, and even after, it was literally like God was screaming at me - on repeat, no less - that "there is a certain freedom in letting go." If I'm honest, I was thinking, "dude, is this really you? And, if it is, that's all you're going to tell me? What the heck does it even mean?!" After my first mile, I actually stopped and sent a voice memo to a couple of close friends.  For whatever reason, I felt they needed to hear it, too.  

Seriously, as I type this, I'm beginning to think I'm a little crazy. Does this really happen? Was it really God?  I don't know for sure...but I'm convinced it was.  

So... "there is a certain freedom in letting go." Now what?

Here's the thing...there have been several challenging situations arise over the last month that caught me completely off guard.  You would think nothing would surprise me at this point, but - once again - when I think we’ve finally reached the "new normal," BOOM... another "what the heck is happening" moment comes from nowhere. (The surprises can stop anytime now. Just saying!)  But now, I have this random message playing over and over in my head…”there is a certain freedom in letting go.”  As I continued my walk around the lake, it felt like a huge weight was being lifted. 

Letting go. Let me tell you - it's a freaking process!  The letting go concept isn't like letting a helium balloon go.  Nope...it's more like the game "whack a mole" - just when you think you've let something go, it pops back up repeatedly. It's like visiting the Lego aisle at Wal-Mart with my son.  Just when you THINK you've looked at every set and either a) decided on one of them or b) convinced him to leave the aisle, you have to look at just ONE more...or FIVE. Letting go of that aisle is HARD work.

I'm learning - finally - that letting go is a necessary step. Sometimes releasing something means gaining freedom. For a control freak like me, that sounds so counter-intuitive. But, it's not. Here's what I've discovered recently in regards to "letting go:"

• Letting go of things you once thought were good may, in fact, be necessary for your "next step." 
• Letting go of relationships you've had in the past is crucial to the healing process.
• Letting go of the questions that you'll never have an answer to lifts a huge emotional weight.
• Letting go of the fear of failure seems to be a good idea. (I'm trying...this one is a slow process.)
• Letting go of the pressures, expectations, and guilt sounds like it would be very helpful. (Yep, sounds really good...haven't started this one yet.)

The point is this... there IS a certain FREEDOM in LETTING GO. We don't always have to control the reigns and try to puppeteer the outcome to our circumstances.  What if, for once, we let go?  What's the worst that can happen?  Or, could it actually work out for the better? I don't know the answer, but I do know that holding on is downright exhausting at times.  Letting go may be just what we need. What if God's plan can only unfold if we let go?  Maybe that's the freedom we could have? I think it's time for me to let go and see what happens. It won't happen overnight - or maybe not in 3 months. But, letting go seems to be a pretty important part in all of this. Perhaps letting go means letting something else in.  There's a thought...

My challenge to you...what can you let go of today (or in the future) to experience a greater freedom in your life? 

For me, letting go of a toxic situation lifted a huge weight I didn't realize I was carrying. Thank goodness...

Until next time... Kari [xoxo]